Apparently, I normally look like rubbish.

red coat


I have a confession to make – I love yoga pants.

And I mean really love them. Especially when I’m doing things around the house, they’re the perfect item of clothing to throw on. I spend the majority of my time running after three kids, preparing meal after meal, attempting to keep our house somewhat tidy (and usually failing miserably), and taxiing my kids around town, so I don’t really have the chance to get more dressed up if I don’t have something special and out-of-the-ordinary going on. Just give me a hoodie and a nice pair of black yoga pants and I’m a happy girl.

Now, don’t start thinking that I don’t care about what I look like, because I do. I always shower, slap on a bit of makeup, style my hair, and pop on some accessories. After all, I wouldn’t want to scare the crap out of any small kids when I’m at the school (and the sight of me without any makeup and sporting an unruly case of bedhead most definitely would).

But now and then, I get tired of my adopted ‘mom uniform’ and feel like dressing up in something that hasn’t been smeared in snot and drool so many times that it has permanent streak marks down it. That’s when I delve into the back of my closet where my BC (Before Children) clothes live and pull out something that makes me feel all fancy-shmancy. And that, my friends, is a good feeling…..because every girl likes to feel a bit fancy now and then.

Last Wednesday, I was meeting up with a friend in the morning and decided that I’d forego my usual clothes in favor of a nice pair of jeans, a new top, and a matching scarf to finish it off. I looked in the mirror and felt pretty damn good. Not a booger streak in sight.

But when I went to grab my winter coat, I noticed that there was a splash of dried mud right down the front of it. And then I remembered that the boys had been jumping in the mud puddles after school. I must have been right in the firing line and not even noticed it. All of this Spring-like weather really lifts your spirits, but the snow melt is a nightmare when you have three boys who can’t resist water (except when it’s bath time, of course). And if my washing machine survives all of this slush and mud, it’ll be nothing short of a miracle.

So I went into our coat closet and discovered my very favorite piece of BC clothing – my red coat. 

Ooooh, yes, I thought to myself. This is definitely a red coat kind of day.

I slipped my arms into the sleeves and as I was buttoning it up, Finn walked over to me and blurted out, “Are you going on a date?!”

“No,” I told him. “You know Daddy’s out of town today.”

“Yeah, but you only wear that coat when you have a date.” He folded his arms and look at me accusingly. I suddenly felt like I was on trial. Who knew he was so observant?

“Well, Honey, I definitely don’t have a date today. I just decided to wear my red coat for a change,” I explained.

“You know you only wear that coat when you go on a date with Daddy. And you never look this nice when you’re bringing us to school,” he insisted.

“Wow, thanks a lot!” I sputtered. There’s nothing like hearing from your own flesh and blood that you normally walk around looking like absolute rubbish. Good to know.

“You’re sure you don’t have a date today?” he asked again, folding his arms.

“Yes, I’m sure, Finn. I have no hot dates today. Or even mildly warm dates.”

“Then what are you doing while we’re at school?” he insisted.

“I’m meeting a friend for coffee this morning,” I told him.

“You’re going to Starbucks without us?!” He looked genuinely outraged. How dare I have any fun (or hot chocolate) without my children! Such an awful mother.

“Yup, and I’m wearing my red coat the whole time.”

I walked to our back door, where Cal and Ro-Ro were putting on their shoes. They both looked up at me and blurted out, “Why do you look nice?!!

When we arrived at the school, three different people looked genuinely surprised when they looked my way and told me how ‘nice’ I looked.

So that’s it. I think it’s officially time that I retire some of my yoga pants (or at least restrict them to evenings and Sundays) and start making more of an effort. When my kids are this shocked that I’ve put on normal clothes and a full face of makeup, I know there’s a problem.


As a follow up to all of this, my resolution to make more effort and ditch the yoga pants lasted about two days. As it turns out, it’s exhausting trying to look ‘nice’ all the time. I’ll happily settle for now and then….and date nights, of course.




6 thoughts on “Apparently, I normally look like rubbish.

  1. The struggle is real! I used to teach fitness classes and would go volunteer at the kids’ elementary school afterwards. Finally my daughter said to me, “Mommy, could you not come to the school when you’ve just taught two classes? After one, it’s not so bad, but after two . . .” (Naturally I put her up for adoption. Ya know in my mind.)

      • Good news: My kids are approaching 22, 20, and 18. Turns out the brutality has a bell curve. (It peaked in middle school, so look out!) They’re much gentler these days.
        Our conversation here reminds me of a post I wrote called “Parenting Teens: Stupid Mama Syndrome.” Not going to goop up your comments with links, but yeah–SMS. It’s a thing!
        Adolescents. Bless ’em!

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